Wednesday Randomness: Best & Worst Sex Scenes

This week, we’re talking about the Best & Worse when it comes to sex scenes.

Worst sex scenes, in my opinion, have one or more of the following:

  • No reason to be having sex at that point in the story. Sex for sex’s sake.
  • Stilted dialogue. Sooo uncomfortable, though I have laughed while reading some, just imaging some dude, or worse, my husband saying something like that in the middle of sex.
  • Shying away from real talk. For example, calling a cock a love sword…. That is just… Just no.
  • No connection to the characters. I need to see, feel, hear, smell what the character whose head I’m in is. Otherwise I feel no connection whatsoever and that makes it boring for me.
  • Speaking of connection… When the characters have no connection. I’m not saying they have to be in love, particularly early in a book, but there has to be something. If it’s all physical and lust-driven, I want to feel that. If other emotions are creeping in, I want to feel that.
  • When suddenly what they are doing is so out of character with no explanation given. Easy example of this is when reading a story, and things are moving along, then comes the sex scene and WHOA BUDDY suddenly BDSM sex is into play. Whips and chains and latex, oh my. No hint before that any of the characters were remotely interested or curious about such things. No talk of limits, safety, no consent…
  • And lack of consent, in general. Consent is sexy AND required, folks.

The best sex scenes, for me, are…well, the opposite of what I listed above. LOL

Beyond that, what do I love in a sex scene? Dirty talk – oh yeah. Laughter and teasing – I like when sex is fun. Sure, laughter isn’t appropriate in a particularly raw, emotional sex scene, but it’s appropriate, and awesome, at other times. Angry sex – not rape, not someone forcing themselves on someone, but the characters worked up and angry, and fuck it, they’re gonna have some sex. Love me BDSM and D/s scenes – no surprise there. And emotions. I want all the emotions, people. ALL. OF. THEM.


Bronwyn Green | Gwendolyn Cease

Wednesday Randomness: Best & Worst Characterization

Happy Wednesday.

Life is NUTSO in chez Jarman, friends. My daughter is graduating tomorrow – 3 outta 4 kids are HS graduates, how did that happen?? So it’s been a huge crazy time, getting ready for that and out of town guests and a party… I’m exhausted, man.

And okay, something happened and only the first bit of my post was saved and posted. It was likely something I did but frick if I know what. LOL So I’ll rewrite the rest soon…cause I have thoughts about characterization…so many thoughts. 😀

For now though, go and check out Bron’s post

Wednesday Randomness: Best and Worst – Writing Process


This week we’re sharing a new feature – Best & Worst. It’s not the best and worst for everyone, but what is best and worst personally for the blogger. For example, this week we’re talking Best & Worst Writing Process. So I’m going to share what writing process is the worst for me, and what is the best.

So I’ll start with…The whole “vomit the first draft” thing. For those unfamiliar, it’s the idea that you just write the first draft without fixing anything – you just write it all out…word vomit. This does not work for me. I know, for some people, this is awesome and works super well for them. I am not one of those people. I get incredibly anxious and frustrated, and it actually makes it difficult to write at all.

Now for what works best for me. I think a lot about the main characters. And, I mean, a lot. About them, their motivations, their familys, their lives. I don’t write all of this down. I will jot some notes down, especially if something is going to factor heavily into the story, but that’s it. It’s really just me, spending some time with the characters, getting to know them.

I outline my stories. Now, by outline I don’t mean tons of pages with every detail (that process isn’t the WORST for me but it’s a close second. Long outlines with every minute detail makes me feel as though I’ve already written the book at that point.) My style of outline is a list of the big moments. Things that absolutely have to happen to get my characters from the beginning to their happily ever after at the end. For series that have an overarching story arc through several books, the outline is a bit more detailed but not much.

Once I have that, I start writing, working my way to that first big moment, then the next, then the next. I try to be flexible, because some of the best moments in my books, in my opinion, were when the story or characters veered off of my intended path. That’s when I start talking to myself.

The answer to that, sadly, is yes, yes, we do.

It’s not a complex process, but it works for me. A bit of structure – a wee roadmap with all the main points on it – and some flexiblity to accept and work with the sidetrips my brain (aka story and characters) take me on.


Bronwyn Green | Gwendolyn Cease | Jessica De La Rosa | Siobhan Muir